The Greatest Love of All

The Greatest Love of All

by Linda Heron Wind, Ph.D.

What is the greatest love of all? Is it loving your enemies, or those that have hurt you? No, the greatest love makes that look easy! Loving enemies that you only see now and then is not hard. Loving someone you see daily, even every moment is much more difficult. The greatest love of all is loving yourself. You might think you love yourself, but do you really? Do you love all of yourself? Do you love even the parts of yourself that you know as the "other?" For in unity consciousness, we understand that within each of us is the whole of all that is.

As I watch myself and others struggle with this new vibration that now permeates this Earth plane, I consider the nature of the struggle. In many ways it seems like we are all shadow boxing - fighting with our shadows either within or projected onto others. The inner fighting is to change the parts of ourselves that we don't like, the ones that we see as less than perfect. Yet there is something inherently flawed in the idea that there are parts of ourselves that need changing or that we are less than perfect. In many ways it seems like we are trying to run in a straight line on a circular track.

Whether we like something or not seems to depend on whether it meets our expectations. Likewise, liking ourselves means that we are meeting our expectations for ourselves. But suppose the only expectation we had was to be who we are in this moment. Could we simply like what is in this moment because it is? What makes us think that we have the script for our lives that says what is in this moment is wrong or bad or in need of change?

We are a beautiful dance of energy that attracts and repels other energy in ways that are perfect for the experience we need in this dimension. Every single part of us is part of this dance, the parts we are aware of and the parts that we are not, the parts we like and the parts we don't. To exclude or label some parts of us as bad and others as good is like being in a dysfunctional family that labels one or two members as the scapegoat. "If only that part of me would stay under control," we say, "then my life would be perfect!" "If only the part of me that eats too much would stop, or if only the part of me that is depressed could feel joy, or if only the part of me that gets angry would keep its mouth shut, or if only _____." These statements are signs of a dysfunctional inner family.

Unity consciousness and the love vibration require that we learn to accept all parts of ourselves as part of the inner family. Yes, you say, but what if their behavior is unacceptable? Can't you love the part but not like its behavior? Good question. This is politically correct language to use with children and I even heard my four year old granddaughter correct her father with, "No Daddy, you aren't upset with me, you're upset with my behavior." The answer to this that I have been able to discern so far is that whatever behavior anyone or any part of us does is the best they are able to do in that moment. We can choose in that moment how we want to be with the behavior, but must accept it as the "other's" best.

Let me give you an example. I have had many experiences where someone was angry, sad, abusive, or frightened and my choice of response was to be loving. Being loving as a response means that I am present, witnessing the other person's emotion, and feeling loving compassion for them - not sympathy, or feeling sorry for them but respect for their best effort. I think of when, perhaps, that was the best I could do and know that what I am seeing is a part of them that has not been loved. When I can do this, which is certainly not all the time, that part that has not been loved feels loved and accepted. Real connection is made and something shifts.

The alternative is saying, "I love you but your behavior is unacceptable," or on a vibrational level, "I am saying I love you but I am rejecting part of you." Now that is a bit confusing! I certainly am not suggesting that you become a doormat or say that anything goes. If something does not feel good to you, of course it is your responsibility to address it - in a loving way, with respect for the "other."

Now all that we have said about how we respond to others is hard enough, but we must also apply it to how we respond to ourselves. Any part of you that is acting out is wanting to be loved. You can find that part unacceptable or you can love it. If you find it unacceptable, know that it will act out more. If you love it, you will make real connection with it and something will shift.

So instead of shadow boxing, how about shadow loving? One of the most inspiring sayings from the Mayan Oracle is this quote, "Respond to life with love." What more do we really have control over other than our response to life and to ourselves? In this time of Venus energy, see if you can embrace the greatest love of all.

Love is the answer
To the following question:
What resolves conflict?

Love is just a choice
Of how to be with what is
How you meet the now

If you have comments on these articles or ideas for future topics, call Linda Heron Wind at (585) 924-5620 or send e-mail to LHWind@aol.com.

Page last modified June 3, 2003 by RMC